Saturday 3 September 2011

We are pregnant!

Exactly a year ago, we found out that we were having a baby and let me tell one thing: it was an absolute shock to the system. 

 
I had just lost my grandad 5 days ago and did think that this was the simple explanation for me not having my period. I didn't think for a second that I could be pregnant. We weren't trying for a baby and most of all, I was on the pill. But when I was feeling sick three mornings in a row and my mum jokingly told me not to make her a grandmother yet, I started worrying. My mum had fallen pregnant with me when she was on the pill. What if her fade was now mine? 
I started to search for pregnancy symptoms on Google and man, did they convince me: Feeling sick? - Tick! Tender breasts? - Tick! Constantly feeling tired? - Tick! A strange taste in my mouth? - Tick! A period that had gone missing somewhere? Tick, tick, tick, tick, tick! I couldn't believe it and told Ben what my mum had said and what Dr. Google was suggesting but instead of having a panic attack, he simply said: "Well, let's buy a test when we put in my prescription tomorrow and then we'll see". By the morning, I had convinced myself that I was pregnant. I had downloaded a baby app for my phone and was looking at the different development stages MY baby would go through before I finally managed to get to sleep. Suddenly, this all felt very real. I was sure we were going to be parents UNTIL I went into the pharmacy and actually bought the test.
I was sure that I had built my hopes up just to be disappointed. So on our way home I kept saying "I'm sure I'm not pregnant", "I'm sure I'm not pregnant" and didn't stop, until I carefully weed into a glass and dunked the test strip into it. It said "Pregnant 3+" before I could even say the word pregnant and oh my god did that emotional roller coaster hit me quickly. I had no idea what I was feeling: I was happy, I was nervous and I started crying when I came down the stairs to show Ben that we were going to be parents. Would I be a good mum? Could we afford a child? What would my parents say?
A year on, I couldn't imagine life without Amy. She's the best thing that could have happened to us and we love her more than words can describe. She is such a happy little baby and I am so incredibly proud of her. She has changed our lives over night and I am still overwhelmed by the feeling of unconditional love that overcomes me when I look at her and she gives me the biggest smile in the world - even when it's at 4.30 am. 

I love you my little Piglet ♥


8 comments:

  1. Yay! A whole year huh? What a fast year it's been aswell! So happy for you being a mummy is such a brilliant experience and Amy s gorgeous and you have been mostly lucky with her sleep routine too (jammy woman!!) xx

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  2. I'm sure I'm not the only person who thought that you were newly pregnant NOW. I was just about to pop the champaign.

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  3. I was like that with my first, I had no idea, I hadn't had a period for three months but that was not unusual it happened all the time, and I started to feel sick and then one day I craved beer (of all things!), so I thought something is wrong, I went to the doctor for all sorts of tests and then went back and saw a different doctor a week later and he said 'right because your pregnant', and he must of seen the look on my face because he siad 'you do know your pregnant, don't you?' I had no idea! That was 5 years ago and my little baby is now at school for his first day today, oh no I'm welling up again!!

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  4. Yes, I thought you were announcing another pregnancy! :-) My little girl is 4 months old and I keep thinking that I would want to be pregnant again!

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  5. Haha, I know. Everyone tells me how lucky I am with her sleeping that well, especially because she is solely breastfed. x

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  6. Haha, no not just yet. I think I'd rather wait a couple of years :)

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  7. It's a great feeling, isn't it? I absolutely loved being pregnant. I had a good pregnancy though. I have friends who felt absolutely dreadful. x

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  8. awww, i knew before i did my test but it was still a shock to actually see the result :) your daughter is beautiful

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